A Thin Line

 A Thin Line 

 (Moe Thet Oo Lwin) 

 Thet Oo gently pushed open the window. A soft, golden sunlight poured in like liquid gold, accompanied by a cool, gentle breeze that drifted into the room. This region, with its four distinct seasons, had left behind the biting cold of winter and welcomed the fresh, awakening touch of spring. But as spring passed, its restless energy faded, making way for the calm stability of summer. And now, it was undeniably summer. 

 The Pistovo Canal is located in the northern part of Moscow. During the summer, Russian traditional summer cottages called “Dacha” and fitness camps were built along its banks for students to relax and enjoy their holidays. The Pistovo Canal, which cuts through a bend of the Volga River, serves as a serene route for leisure cruises sailing along its waters. At the very edge of the canal, the student recreation camp stood—a distant outpost belonging to Thet Oo’s university, Moscow Institute of Physics and Technology (MIPT). 

 "Hey, man... you're up early, huh?"

 Set Paing, still half-asleep on the other bed, mumbled as he yawned. He had woken up when Thet Oo opened the window. 

 "Hey, man… we're going to miss breakfast! Get up, wash your face… and wake up the guys in the other room too!"

 At the mention of breakfast, Zeya and Htain Lin, still rubbing their sleepy eyes ,groggily got up from the next room. 

 "Hurry up, guys! If we're late, the old ladies will clear everything!" 

 Once everyone was ready, the four friends changed into their clothes and walked toward the dining building. Along the way, they noticed cars parked near the small wooden houses. Until yesterday, these houses had been empty. From the looks of it, new arrivals must have come this morning. 

 "They're MSU students... I overheard someone mention it yesterday," 

Htain Lin said, recalling what he had heard. MSU referred to Moscow State University, the largest university in Russia. 

 "Isn't this camp owned by our university? What are they doing here?" 

 "Our university used to be part of MSU's Physics Department, didn't you know? It split off in 1942. Whatever the case, MSU students get special privileges. In Moscow, there are no restrictions for them." 

 As Htain Lin spoke about these "privileged students," Thet Oo glanced over at them. Of course, coming from such a prestigious university, they were probably from wealthy families. He could see them unloading their belongings from high-end, luxury cars parked in front of the dorms. 

 Just then, a girl stepped out of the fourth house near the entrance. She turned to Thet Oo and his friends and… smiled in greeting. For some reason, he felt something unusual stir inside him. Did a pretty Eastern European girl from a country that doesn’t think much of black-haired, greet fair-skinned, small-built Burmese guys like him? He wasn’t sure if he had smiled back instinctively. 

 "She's adorable, isn't she?" 

 Zeya suddenly commented as they arrived at the dining hall. Though unrelated to the conversation, it was clear that his "adorable" remark referred to the smiling girl from earlier—just as if someone had responded, "Bless you," to a completely unrelated sneeze. The three others immediately understood but chose not to comment.

 After finishing their meal, they headed back. In the afternoon, some friends planned to go swimming in a nearby canal. Since Thet Oo wasn't a strong swimmer, he decided to stay at the dorm. As the midday heat made his eyelids heavy, he dozed off for a while. 

 When he woke up, it was already around 9 PM. Since the sun didn’t set until about 11 PM during summer, the sky was still bright. The swimming group hadn’t returned yet. He recalled overhearing that they planned to have a barbecue in the forest, so that probably explained their absence. 

 He lit a cigarette and gazed out through the window. There she was, the girl from this morning, carrying some bags as she walked past their dorm. It looked like she was moving into a house inside the compound. She must have noticed Thet Oo watching because she turned and smiled again. This time, though, he didn’t feel the same unusual stir as before. He simply smiled back. She then walked toward the small wooden house at the farthest edge near the forest and went inside. 

 As dusk finally settled, wild mosquitoes began swarming. He shut the windows and flopped onto his bed, an inexplicable feeling stirring in his mind. Somewhere near the canal beach, the sound of a guitar echoed through the night. He immediately recognized it—it was a Burmese song, meaning his three friends must have been the ones playing. 

 Just then, he heard footsteps outside near the wooden house. Curious, he peeked through the glass. 

 It was her. 

 She was heading toward the main road—walking away, her steps brisk and purposeful. 

 As Thet Oo watched without understanding, he let out a deep sigh. Thinking deeply, he dozed off for a moment. Then... 

 The loud noises woke him up suddenly. As he listened carefully, he heard someone speaking in Russian. The small light on the clock showed that it was 1 a.m. he looked over at the bed, and his roommate, Set Paing, was peacefully sleeping, enjoying his rest. 

 Through the window, he could see a woman and a young man talking. From their conversation, Thet Oo learned that her name was Dasha and the young man’s was Vagin. They seemed to him that they were a couple. Since the lights were off, in the darkness, he could barely make out their figures under the moonlight, and their shapes appeared different. He realized that Vagin, the young man, was a student from Tajikistan. 

 "Vagin... I'm sorry... I really don’t like what you did... Okay?" 

 "No, Dasha... Listen to me... You shouldn't be here... Okay? I'm telling you this because I want what's best for you..." 

 "Okay... for my own good... right? Fine... I’m okay now... I have nothing more to say... I’m not coming back. That’s it..." 

 The voices came in and out, sometimes clear, sometimes unclear. The young man seemed to be apologizing in a loud voice, then a softer one, and then a more intense one, as if he were begging. 

 Thet Oo turned his head back towards the pillow. He couldn’t tell whether the two people arguing in front of the building had settled their dispute or not. As the voices grew louder, He was sure that the other students from the dormitory would call the camp supervisor. 

 He put on his headphones, without playing any music and closed his eyes. For some reason, he felt a nervous fluttering in his chest. He turned over, took a puff of a cigarette, and then fell asleep. 

 "Don’t you boys train to swim?" 

 The four of them sitting near the edge of the pier heard the old coach, who was sitting beside them, ask with a smile. 

 "We’re not good enough to swim yet... The water is too deep here..." 

 "That’s why I’m having you practice... Look over there..." 

 Following the old man’s gesture, Thet Oo looked in the direction he pointed. He saw two old women slowly wading into the water. They were wearing round hats to protect themselves from the sun’s heat. As they swam, they drifted from the shallow end into the deeper part of the canal. There was no splash, no sound of the water... Then, with just a women’s conversation, they disappeared completely beneath the surface of canal. 

 "Do you think they know how to swim...?" 

 They couldn’t say a word. Htein Lin stretched his shoulders like an idiot. 

 "Come on... I'll teach you how to swim... Let’s go up on the edge of the pier." 

 The four of them, initially hesitant, climbed up to the edge of the pier. The old man looked at Htein Lin closely and said... 

 "You jump first. Once you jump and land in the water, don’t hesitate to move... Throw your arms out. Then, use your feet to kick the water... When you throw your arms, don’t just move them — turn your body about 70 degrees in the water and take a breath... Then jump."

 Htein Lin jumped. As the old man said, he jumped and swam back to the shore. Then it was Zeya, followed by Set Paing, and lastly, Thet Oo. Each of them swam twice, and after a little effort, we all getting braver. Then another lap... Zeya, Set Paing... and finally, Thet Oo.

 "That’s enough... Now jump..." 

 Thet Oo, dived in at full speed. As soon as he hit the water, he realized... he had no idea why he had jumped in that way. Every other time, he had jumped from that spot, but this time, diving made him sink like an arrow. When he tried to switch to a swimming posture, he felt around with his feet, but there was no ground beneath him. He realized that he had already sunk into the water. When the people on the shore saw him, they realized he was drowning. 

 "Help... Help me..." 

 The second time he surfaced, his voice was faint, and before he could finish speaking, he sank back into the water. Just before reaching the deeper part of the water, he noticed someone jumping in to help. Suddenly, the person surfaced, and as he came up Thet Oo realized someone was pushing him from behind. 

 He couldn’t even see who it was. With all his strength, he swam back towards the shore. When he reached the shore, he collapsed and sat down. His body was shaking. It wasn’t from the cold... It was the trembling caused by the touch of death. 

 Then, suddenly, he remembered something. 

 A rescuer... Who was it? 

 Turning his head towards the pier’s diving board side, he saw the rescuer smiling as they swam towards him. It seemed... Oh. It’s she. 

 "I really appreciate it, Darya..." 

 "Please don’t mention that, Thet. I didn’t help because I wanted thanks..." 

 She said with a smile, swaying her golden hair as she spoke. After getting familiar with each other, he began calling her "Dasha" instead of "Darya." Although he was curious about her and Vagin, he refrained from asking, as it was a personal matter. 

 She was a student majoring in journalism at MSU. She said she would always come to visit the Pistovo canal every summer. She respected Asian values and Eastern culture. 

 "By the way, Thet... I’d like to interview you..." 

 "About what, Dasha?" 

 "About the perspectives of a foreign student... I want to ask about those things..." 

 "Sure, go ahead..." 

 She smiled like a ray of light and pulled a recorder out of her bag and turned it on. Then, she asked about the differences in the education systems, the favorite and least favorite things about Russia, and so on. Thet Oo answered to the best of his understanding and knowledge. 

 "I have one last question..." 

 "Go ahead, Dasha..." 

 "As an Asian man from a culture-based society that values emotional love over sexual relationships, what would your ideal relationship look like if you had a Russian girlfriend? Also, how do love and the Asian personality balance each other?" 

 "Well..." 

 Thet Oo was having difficulty answering. 

 "Uh... How should I put this? Well, I can't really answer that... But the answer is in my heart... It's just hard to put it into words... That's how it is..." 

 "Alright then... Thank you, Thet." 

 "The pleasure is mine, Dasha." 

 The two-week break seemed to pass quickly. During that time, Thet Oo often met and spoke with Dasha. He also saw Vagin frequently. He felt that Vagin didn't really like him much. Since Dasha is his girlfriend, Thet Oo hadn't really thought much about it. With Dasha, they often talked about art, culture, and other topics.

 After the two-week break ended, the students gathered for a performance on the final evening. Thet Oo, Zeya, and Set Paing performed in a play called "The Ring of Desire," in which they played three dwarfs who appeared every time a ring was rubbed. The play was funny because only one line—“Sir,” “What?” “Do you want?”. The audience laughed a lot. Then, Thet Oo entertained everyone by playing the song "Lat Tee" by Bo Phyu on the guitar, and the Russian students cheered and clapped along. 

 After the performance, they returned to their dorms. They would be going back to their university the following day. Thet Oo and his friends started packing their things and finished it around midnight. While they were resting for a while, they heard Dasha Calling from the doorway. 

 "Thet... Please!" 

 "Thet, the girl is here..." 

 Thet Oo, without responding to him, walked outside. 

 "Good evening, Thet." 

 "Good evening, Dasha." 

 "Thet... I need your help... Please come with me for a while..." 

 Dasha, then promptly grabbed his hand and swiftly walked toward her house. She opened the door as they reached there and they both stepped inside. 

 "Don't you still have things to pack?" 

 "No, Thet... just a moment..." 

 Dasha looked out the window toward the road. Then she suddenly turned back and kissed him, passionately. He, too, returned the kiss, losing all control. There were no barriers, no hesitation. After about two minutes of this dreamlike moment, Thet Oo noticed someone standing at the room door... Vagin... was it Vagin? 

 Dasha looked surprised when she saw Vagin there. She stared at him in awe. 

 "What are you doing here, Vagin?" 

 "Shouldn't I be the one asking you what you're doing here?" 

Vagin replied. 

 "As you see..." 

 Vagin shook his head slowly and then, with a frustrated tone, said, 

"Sorry, Dasha... I’m leaving now." 

 After Vagin left through the door, Thet Oo suddenly distanced himself from Dasha. 

 "What are you doing, Dasha?" 

 "I’m sorry if I tricked you... I didn't mean to... I apologize for that, Thet." 

 Thet Oo managed his anger and spoke slowly. 

 "You saved my life once... Therefore, I don't blame you for tricking me... But..." 

 Thet Oo paused his words. 

 "Go ahead, Thet... I’m curious—do you mean to say that there's a man who wouldn't accept a kiss from a girl? What will say about that? I’m really interested." 

 Thet Oo looked intently into at Dasha’s eyes. 

 "I’m Burmese, Dasha... We, Burmese people, always try to control our emotions when it comes to girls who already have someone they care about. The feelings I have toward a girl are based on this thin line— a line we hold in high regard, like life itself. I hope you now understand the answer to the question I couldn’t answer during the interview... Alright... I’ll leave now, Dasha. If we meet again, I’d prefer us to be in a pure friendship. Nighty night, Dasha!" 

 Dasha looked at him in amazement, remaining silent with a thoughtful expression. 

 As Thet Oo stepped out of the Nano electronics practical room, Zeya, spoke to him with a mischievous tone. 

 "Hey, man! Remember the interview with the girl who asked about you at Pistovo? It’s in the student newspaper. Did you know? Look here..." 

 Zeya handed him the newspaper. Thet Oo smiled and gave a slow shake of his head. Zeya stared back, uncomprehending. But in his mind, he wonder how he could fill the tiny gap in his heart – a space no wider than a thin line, left in his heart— a piece of the puzzle he couldn’t quite solve. 

 Moe Thet Oo Lwin (20-8-2013)